At the end of the day people won't remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel.

Have you ever experienced the heart-wrenching moment when your child looks you in the eyes and says, 'Mom, I know you love me, but I don't feel the love'? I certainly have, and each time I reflect on that painful memory, it brings tears to my eyes. It happened over fifteen years ago when my daughter Sara, then sixteen, bravely uttered those words. At that moment, I felt lost and confused, unable to comprehend what she meant. My immediate reaction was defensiveness—I listed all the actions I believed demonstrated my love for her and her sibling. I was a class mother, a soccer coach, a dedicated presence at school events—how could she question my love?

But Sara's words lingered, haunting me. Despite acknowledging my efforts, she insisted that she couldn't 'feel' my love. It was a wakeup call that I couldn't ignore. Strangely, I realized I felt the same way about my own mother. Was this a transgenerational pattern?

Thus began my journey of introspection and self-discovery. What did Sara mean by not feeling my love? How could a child who received all the care and attention a mother could provide still feel disconnected? It took years of soul-searching, meditation, and journaling before I finally found clarity. And it all boiled down to one crucial element: energy.

When our heart and mind are in harmony, our energy flows effortlessly. We live in the present moment, and others can genuinely connect with us. However, when our internal harmony is disrupted, when our thoughts and emotions are out of sync, we feel restless, dissatisfied, as if something crucial is missing. Others may even sense a disconnect between our actions and our true feelings. Do you relate? Can others feel your loving energy?

Parental love is meant to be unconditional and everlasting, a gift bestowed upon our children. Yet, in our fast-paced, technology-driven world, are our children truly able to feel this love? Are we present during bedtime stories, or are we mentally preoccupied with our to-do lists? When our children share stories about their day, do we genuinely care and engage, or are we distracted by other concerns? Do we actively participate in playtime, or do we allow ourselves to be consumed by social media?

Sept. 2023 with my daughter’s Sara and Ally, my two grandchildren, Krishna and Amaury and my son in-law Matt.

As a mother of three young adults and a grandmother, I've learned invaluable lessons along my journey. I've come to realize that these seemingly mundane moments with our children are, in fact, precious and fleeting. They are the magical moments that shape our relationships and memories. So, I implore you: cherish them, savor them, and hold them close to your heart.

1. Meditate and Visualize: Take time to meditate and visualize the kind of relationship and emotions you wish to cultivate with your children. Make it vivid and emotional, connecting deeply with both your mind and heart. For instance, envision what it feels like when you're reading to your child or discussing their day.
    
2. Be Present, Be In The Moment: Time seems to pause when we're fully engaged in the moment. These moments are pure magic. Laugh, giggle, and truly commit to being there mentally and emotionally. If your mind starts to wander, reflect on what might be blocking you from giving your all in that moment. Remember, it's about quality time, not quantity. Set aside distractions like your phone, and set a timer if needed to ensure you're fully present.
    
3. Practice Gratitude: Reflect on the special, loving moments you share with your children each day. Express gratitude for these moments and cherish them deeply. They serve as reminders of the beauty and joy found in the connection with your children.

In the hustle and bustle of modern life, it's easy to lose sight of what truly matters – the precious moments we share with our children. By embracing simple yet powerful strategies like meditation, being fully present, and practicing gratitude, we can cultivate a profound connection that transcends time and space.



Let's commit to being more than just physically present in our children's lives. Let's show up with our hearts wide open, ready to embrace every giggle, every story, and every tender moment shared with them.